haircuts and suits for everybody....

I sit down to write today for one simple reason. I want to share with you an opinion. This opinion is mine only, and should not reflect the other writers of this board.

I HATE The New York Yankees.

Whew. There I said it. I don’t have a whole lot of hot opinions. I don’t have a strong stance when it comes to DH vs. no DH. Although it is kinda funny to watch a pitcher hit, and as the announcers talk about little league stats for the guy, he smacks a dinger. Priceless. I don’t worry about the in-depth rules of the infield fly rule, because its one of those “use at your own risk” type of rules.

But I do believe I hate the Yankees as much as I hate hangovers. I hate them more than I hate that annoying way people breathe into the phone when they are trying to talk to you about the merits of Vibe and Soap Digest. I hate them more than I hate that little piece of gum you pick up on the sole of your shoe, and carry all day, only to look at your shoe and see hair, and something that looks like a smushed cheerio.

The Yankees are cocky. Sure they have a lot of championships under their collective belt. So what? I can buy a trophy if I have enough money. They have a bevy of talent in their farm system, but tend to spend money the way a depressed guy shops for a home stereo. They sign guys that seem to have been created in a lab, from a test tube. They athletes they sign are pretty, strong, marketing geniuses, and all have that “why can’t you come home with friends like that guy” sort of presence.

I look at the prospective rosters on ESPN.com yesterday, and see that they have signed exactly 1 new player. Of course that player is Boston media darling Johnny Damon. Of course he was a media darling for shirking the norm, growing his hair out and having a “come down from the hills and have my baby” sort of beard. Now in New York, he is that center fielder with a weak arm.

Jason Giambi was the same sort of player in Oakland. Tattoos, long hair, riding his Harley, he was that white trash story of Cinderella. Now? He is a once great, but tainted by juice, might be past his prime, probably traded for a can of tuna mid-season type of player.

As a Ranger fan, don’t get me started on A-Rod and his fat wallet.

So I could rant all day on the fact that my hatred of the Yankees makes me dislike Donny Baseball. It even surpasses the fact that Wade Boggs was a favorite of mine, until he suited up in the pinstripes. I could tell you how I laugh when they loose, deny any win they might have, and wonder when the Mets are going to have their year. But I won’t. Instead, I will say:

I HATE THE NEW YORK YANKEES